It’s still strange to really think that she isn’t here with us anymore, that she won’t be at the next family gathering or holiday. My dad’s sister (one of two), and my mom’s-brother’s-wife, she was my “double aunt”. I remember spending lots of evenings over at their house as a kid,  playing in the back yard, the swimming pool, tinkering around on the piano, having dinner. I remember every time we asked her “what’s for dinner?”, she would always answer the same way- “food.”

One time my sisters and I were spending the night there (I think my parents were going out of town for some reason), and I was on medicine for strep throat. I begged my mom to get me the swallow-able pills, but she ended up getting me the liquid medicine instead. I don’t do liquid medicine, to this day (just ask mark!). But as a child, you have no choice, and you have to suffer (or gag/almost puke every time- in my case) through it.

She called me over to the table, and had the bottle of medicine sitting there… she then pulled out this HUGE wooden spoon and said something like “time to take your medicine!”. She had an interesting sense of humor  The medicine was supposed to taste like bananas or something (who’s idea is that!?!?) and I think we ended up trying to mix it into some applesauce to mask it… but I just ended up with a bowl full of nasty tasting applesauce that I had to then eat ALL of… bad idea.

I spent my first year of college at the University of Hawai’i, and as most college student know, opening your mailbox to find something in there is like finding gold! My aunt would write to me on a regular basis, and send me little gifts, stamps, etc. It was always nice to get a letter or a note from someone, and always fun to write back. I have no idea what we wrote about, it seems so long ago now. I should look to see if I still have any of those letters.

When she and my uncle were celebrating their 25th wedding anniversary, they came up with the idea of hosting a “show” of sorts. Each person in the family could choose an “act” to perform, and that would be the entertainment for the event. I was in the 5th grade, and completely in love with Winnie the Pooh… so I got my sister and a few of my cousins together, and we compiled about 5 songs to perform for our “act”. I remember rehearsing in my aunt and uncle’s living room for my aunt- she had pulled out the vacuum cleaner for us to use as a microphone to practice. I think I wanted to do something like 12 songs originally- over filling my plate (and probably everyone’s fill of winnie the pooh) like usual. She helped us narrow it down to just a few songs, and then we practiced our choreography. My cousin made us all costumes – they looked great!!! The show was a hit, and other performances (that I remember) included a piano solo, a choreographed girls dance group, oldies songs sung/choreographed by my mom and aunts, a HILARIOUS magic show, some song parodies, and probably more singing… what can I say, we have quite the talented family
It wasn’t until YEARS later that she told me that the show only went on because I was so excited about the whole thing, and no one wanted to let me down, so everyone got their act together. It’s true, I probably would have been crushed if I were told the show was cancelled. I guess that’s the power of love… and a lesson in thinking before you speak, or at least tell a child

There are many more memories I have with her that I will keep close to my heart. Most recently, I remember going to visit her at home after one of her treatments. She had lost all of her hair, and a considerable amount of weight, but she was working on regaining her strength. She had her walker out and showed off to my cousin and I how she could get up and walk around a bit. It was great to see her up and moving again! She had a very optimistic attitude, explaining that positive thoughts and energy were the best thing for her. To see someone go through what she went through, and prevail with optimism is inspiring to say the least.

She took off her head wrap and showed us her bald little head. I never thought that was something she would do, but she did. Sometimes people surprise you.

I am sad for my family and our loss.  I do find relief knowing she isn’t suffering any longer. She was always very supportive of me and my endeavors, and always made sure to tell me so.

She wrote this to me in an email in 2006, and it’s something I have always remembered. Boy, was she right.
“Whatever happens, not to sound to blunt, but life goes on. Sometimes change is good, sometime change is not good, but change is always hard.”

<3

When people find out that I have a full-time job ON TOP of photography, I often get a bewildered look, followed with a “seriously?? How do you do it?!” or the very common “are you insane??”. The answers to those questions are “I just do” and “probably, most days”.

The truth is, I work really hard. A lot.

Monday through Friday I wake up at 630ish, head to work at my day-job, where I am an Art Director/Graphic Designer/Marketing Assistant for 8+ hours. Then I come home, figure out what we’re doing for dinner, eat, and then hop on the computer and start working the night away- catching up on social media, editing, packaging client orders, placing print orders, and on rare occasion working on marketing materials for myself… however that always seems to get the short end of the stick. I stay awake, working by computer- glare until around 11pm-1am, then pry myself off of the computer to go to bed so I can wake up and do it all over again. Weekends are generally filled with photo shoots, commitments with family and friends, and hopefully taking my dog to the park. Also more editing, networking, and catching up on blog posts (which I need to work on!), editing, culling, more editing, and sometimes a little shopping

It’s a busy life, and sometimes, I literally stop and ask  myself WHHYYYYYYY???? I don’t like not getting enough sleep, or spending enough time with my boyfriend and pup, or ALWAYS being busy. But it’s what I do. Partially because I think it’s in my blood, partially because i’m a crazy work-a-holic, and mostly because in order to do what I love, it’s what must be done.

Regardless of how much I want to scream, cry, kick and scream and quit sometimes, I don’t think that’s even a realistic possibility for me. I love it too much.  Scheduling “days off” for  myself is a normal thing for me. I don’t remember what being bored feels like, and my favorite thing to make for dinner is reservations.

But it is a labor of love.

I know that while it seems like I am killing myself now, I am sowing a seed for the future. I am building my business, so that one day, when the time is right, I can focus solely on what is most important to me, what feeds my soul. I will have more time for loved ones and doing things I want to do, like travel more, read books, relax, and grow my business.

I am so thankful to have such a supportive, understanding man to call my own. He is ever-patient with my crazy schedule, and always supportive of me and my ideas/endeavors, no matter how crazy they may seem. He never gives me a hard time about not spending enough time with him, and always offers words of encouragement when I am feeling down. He believes in me, and I couldn’t ask for more than that.

So even though some days I’d rather throw my arms in the air and say “forget it!”, I just learn to take breaks. It can wait until tomorrow. Or the weekend. Part of being successful in anything you do is taking care of yourself. I’ve learned that sometimes it’s better to just take the night off, not worry about everything, and try again tomorrow. I think I deserve it, and I know it helps.

I could never quit. I don’t know how, and I wouldn’t want to.

“On the mountains of truth you can never climb in vain: either you will reach a point higher up today, or you will be training your powers so that you will be able to climb higher tomorrow.”
-Friedrich Nietzsche

“In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins- not through strength but by perseverance.”
- H. Jackson Brown 

“People of mediocre ability sometimes achieve outstanding success because they don’t know when to quit. Most men succeed because they are determined to.”
- George E. Allen 

Let’s get real for a minute. Or a weekend, rather.

This past weekend, I was invited to be a part of something truly amazing. Life-changing amazing. That might sound like a big deal… well IT IS! I was lucky enough to be selected to attend a live workshop with Tamara Lackey as my instructor at the creativeLIVE studios in Seattle, WA. The two-day workshop was focused on “Taking Care of Business”, which for me relates to my photo business. This workshop marks a very pivotal point in my path as a professional photographer and business owner.

Brace yourself for one long, reflective, blog-post about my experiences, and my thoughts. You might want to single-task for this

As the owner of a photography business, I am expected to be everything. Or at least have it all covered. Aside from being a good photographer, I am expected to know how to be a good business manager, a good accountant, a good sales person, a good marketer, a good designer, a good… well you get the point. For the past as-long-as-I-can-remember-since-I-started-this-whole-business, I have tried to be ALL of that. And over and over and over, I have failed, miserably. Hopefully from an outside perspective this isn’t SO apparent, and I have a feeling that it isn’t since people continually ask me “how do you do it ALL!?”. The answer: I don’t think I do!!!

But guess what? Failure is a key piece of the puzzle of success. And I’m ok with that. For every 10 times I fall flat on my face, I move forward. I know this. I have known this. For some reason, I just didn’t know that it applied to me, until this past weekend.

There is something so incredibly profound about someone speaking to your heart. It’s like all of a sudden, you can feel this rush of warmth fill in spaces in your heart that you didn’t know were missing. And at the same time, your brain gets all tingly, and a lightbulb goes off, and the clouds open up. All at once. That’s the best I can describe it, clarity.

I arrived late Thursday evening, checked into my room, and went down to the hotel restaurant to meet up with my new friends and colleagues- the other chosen ones. I was so excited to meet them all in person, especially after doing a little online stalking, and emailing. You could tell that everyone was anxious, excited, and a little nervous for the entire experience. But at least we were all in the same boat.

I could hardly sleep that night. I don’t know if it was excitement, or just that normally I’d be up working/editing away anyways. Needless to say, getting up at 6am was NOT easy, lol. But one thought about being LIVE on camera for 8 hours to literally thousands of viewers got me in that shower and getting ready FAST. I met up with a couple of the other students, Jesse and Donovan and we all walked across the street to the creativeLIVE studios together.
From the moment we walked in, you could feel the energy of the atmosphere. Positive. For some reason, I wasn’t nervous to be on camera. Thinking about how thousands of people were watching live just didn’t seem to phase me. Maybe it was that everyone else was so nervous they just sucked the energy for that right out of me… Whatever it was, I am incredibly thankful. The set was gorgeous. Modern, sleek, and fun looking, complete with pretty green apples! Everyone on the set was incredibly kind and welcoming. I felt like we were all long-lost friends! The rest of the students and Tamara arrived, and soon enough Celeste was counting down until we went live.

While re-capping every little detail might be interesting to some, I’d rather reflect on the experience, and what I have learned from it. Since I love lists, here you go:

Things I have learned, and will be implementing into my business, and life.
•  I can’t do it ALL. Nor should I attempt to. What I can do, is figure out my strengths, my passions, and delegate the rest.
• Emotional and physical rest are a VITAL part to being successful. Work in 90 minute intervals, and single-task to get more done.
• I need to be affectionate towards the business side of my business. Dreading it will get me nowhere, and when you break it down, it’s really not all that scary anyways.
• My brand needs to be a reflection of ME. Anyone can buy equiptment, learn PS, etc., but what will set me apart is branding myself in a way that reflects who I am and what I believe.
• Branding and marketing are two separate things. Recognize that. Divide and conquer.
• Realize what makes me dead inside. Stop doing those things, and find a way to take care of them in a different way.
• Know my role. I am an artist, not so much a visionary or manager. Knowing this will help me figure out what I should be tackling myself, and what I should leave up to others.
• There are other ways to get work done than hiring a full time person. Interns, part timers, and commission-based helpers are all options.
• It NEEDS to be EASY to do business with me. I need better marketing materials, and a better mindset.
• You can change your mindset, if you can accept the idea, be ok with the idea, and own the idea. I am working on this, specifically when it comes to helping clients choose the best prints/albums/wall portraits/etc. for their homes. Realizing that they are coming to me because I am the expert, and they want my advice. By changing this mindset, I can change the experience, and therefore change my outcome.
• Money. It’s not the root of all evil, but blind worship of it is. I need to get a better handle on all things financial within my business, and personal life. This will help me achieve my goals much faster.
• The more money you spend, the less you have. The less money you spend, the more you have. Sounds so simple, but definitely spoke to me.
• Fear is a normal thing, and even a good thing. Fear is inevitable, and a part of the process. If you’re scared, you’re probably doing something right.
• Stop telling yourself things that you wouldn’t openly tell someone you love. Get rid of the negative thoughts.

Things I am going to change
• Better up-front communication with clients about their experience. I will help to plan the shoot better, get to know my clients better before the session, and help them through the end of the process by finding out their intention for the shoot, what they’d like to get out of it, and what they’d like to take home from it.
• Acquire my own “team”  to delegate the things I don’t want to do out, so that I can focus on what I do want to do.
• Re-assess and re-brand my business, with an emphasis on who I am, and what my vision is for my clients/work.
• GET IT TOGETHER!!! The business side must be in a good place for me to be successful. I will be better at managing my finances, invoicing, contracts, and clients so that I can stay on top and be a profitable business.
• Simplify the experience. It needs to be easy for clients to work with me, and I need to make it that way.
• SERVICE my clients. I will gain a new perspective, and each time I consider communication with a client, I will first think of how I can better service them. What can I do for them, so that we maintain a relationship that involves the least amount of work on their end, and the most amount of enjoyment.
• I will change my mindset about sales. People are obviously hiring me for a reason, and I need to be better at finding out what that reason is at the beginning of the transaction, and work towards it the entire time.

Whew! I obviously have a LOT to improve, and organize, but thanks to this amazing experience, I now have a starting point, and a very specific direction. This will be a new start to a better experience for my clients, and for myself. In the end, I just want us both to win, and I feel like by moving forward and embracing these new ideas and disciplines, I can accomplish that.

I cannot even tell you how close I have become to the entire group of people who were on this crazy ride with me, but here is a start: (totally stealing your individual-comment-idea Donovan!)

Tamara- WOW. Thank you, for everything. Your honesty, your directness, your challenges, and for sharing your wisdom. I truly feel like you genuinely care about me, and the success of my business, and that is enough to make my eyes well up with tears. There is something so intense about someone who believes in you, and who shows you that. Thank you for sharing that with me, and with all of us. I appreciate your candid nature, and your genuine demeanor. The wealth of knowledge you have shared with me over this past weekend is exactly what I needed, and hoped to gain from this experience. I don’t think I could ever say enough “thank you”s, so I work hard  to instill the knowledge into myself and into my business, since actions speak the loudest. I am so happy that you now know about me , and I sincerely hope that we are able to stay in touch. You are such an inspiration, and I appreciate you. Plus you have some awesome T-rex dance moves.

Erika- You. Are. Amazing. We clicked from the moment I met you, and there is something so genuine and positive about you. You are warm and friendly, and I can tell that you are so dedicated. I know that you will learn to disassociate yourself from the negative, and focus on the positive, only furthering you in many ways. I am happy to know that I have a lifelong friend in you, and I look forward to watching you succeed. Don’t doubt yourself, you’ve got this girl, just freakin’ get started!

Kelli- Girrrrrrrrrl! I can honestly not wait to hang out with you again! I am so happy that I busted down your wall soon enough to get to know you so well in just two days. You are an incredible person, and you are strong. I hope that you embrace yourself more, and infuse that into your business, because you will be unstoppable. Thank you for the laughs, the real convos, and for opening up with me. I am so happy that we are friends, and I know that we will be for a lifetime. WPPI will be here sooner than we know, and I can’t wait to share that experience with you and hopefully our other fellow classmates! Until then, I cast “REVELIO!” on you and your personality, because you have so much to offer to so many. And, my daddy taught me good.

Donovan- Dang boy! You can drop it like it’s hot!! I didn’t expect those dance moves from you, but I should have. You have such a unique talent that I know you will take off and be uber successful with! I am so happy that you have found reason and confidence to take your business to the next level, and to start getting legit. You are worth it, you deserve it, and I hope you won’t sell yourself short anymore. I am so glad that you made it all the way from New Orleans to hang out with us and inspire us all. I love your witty sarcasm, and how you are so meme savvy You have such a warm and friendly demeanor, and I am sure that will only further you in your endeavors. And yes, we will be meeting up again!! Let’s make it happen!

Carolyn- You are wonderful. Your genuine nature and willingness to share your experiences and knowledge is unusual in this industry, and I really appreciated it. You get it. I am so happy that you are booked for a very successful fall season, and I have no doubts that you will continue to succeed with your business. Thank you for sharing stories about your kids, and your experiences, and for sharing your tears. That takes guts. Lots of them. But it’s beautiful to see someone so shamelessly emotional about what is important to them. You inspired me, and I can’t wait until we get to hang again Along with the workshop, one of the most valuable things I learned this weekend was about the golden circle, so thank you for that as well. Cheers to Mountain Dew!

Jesse- I didn’t get to chat with you as much as I would have liked, until the hour before I literally left town. I am so glad I stuck around for that, because you are inspiring. Thank you for your honesty and feedback, I value that so much. You are so careful it seems, with everything. I can tell how much you care about your business, and I know that you will succeed. You have real, raw talent, there’s no denying that. I can’t wait to see what you do with your brand, and how you decide to market YOU. I hope that we get another chance to hang out (WPPI maybe?!!) so that I can see a little bit more of the REAL Jesse Clements

Kenna & Susan- you two are an inspiration. Both of you are so warm, sincere, and welcoming. Thank you so much for the honesty and encouragement. You are a vital part of the CL operation, and it is great to meet you in person after watching you for so long on CL I can’t wait to come back again, and I’m working towards that one-year promise full-force

Celeste- You are a ROCKSTAR. You are incredible at your job, and I can tell how much you really enjoy it. Thank you for being so friendly and engaging, and such a pleasure to work with. I loved hearing about behind the scenes, and watching you in action! Your hard work pays off, and you deserve it. Send me a link to your etsy and post some cute hair fluffs!

Craig- Thank you. THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU for doing what you do, and building such an amazing platform to do it. I believe in creativeLIVE 100%, and I cannot wait to see what comes next. What you do is inspiring, and innovative. All of the people you touch is insane. Thank you for everything. I had such an amazing experience, and I am already ready to come back. You’ve built a fabulous team of people who genuinely care and believe in the same things, and it shows. I am proud to be able to say that I was a tiny piece of the big CL puzzle, and hopefully in the future, I will be able to be a part again. Thank you for welcoming me into your CL family, I am so happy to be a part.

Crew- You are all inspiring. The work you do is incredible, and I am astounded at the level of professionalism and the dedication you have towards the show. I didn’t get to know many of you super well, but your love for your work is evident, and inspiring. Thank you for everything. I couldn’t have had this experience if it weren’t for each and every one of you, and for that, I am so so grateful.

Here are some of my favorites I snapped

Living in apartments always felt so temporary, I never wanted to settle in and turn it into a home. It just seemed like a waste of time and money. We never invested in any nice furniture, aside from a nice wood futon, most everything was from Ikea. Trust me, I love Ikea, but I’m not worried or surprised if something breaks.

I am so looking forward to making our house a home, and I got started this past week with a little project. Baby steps

I had been searching online for a new vanity to match our room better. The one I had was black, (from Ikea, hehe) and while I love it- nice big drawer and glass top- it just didn’t suite the light and airy feel I wanted for the room. We ended up painting our bedroom a light turquoise blue color, with a charcoal accent wall. The blue color turned out to be a bit brighter than I wanted, but instead of instantly repainting, Mark has convinced me to try to make it work. I think secretly he just doesn’t want another opportunity for me to spill paint on the carpet! So I have been turning everything in the room white, and I love the contrasty look I am getting!

Here’s a pic of my super adorable pup on our bed, you can see the greyish accent wall here… and the adorable pup!

I had toyed with the idea of painting the Ikea vanity, but Mark said that it probably wouldn’t hold well since we couldn’t sand it down first, seeing as how it is made of partical wood. So that option was out. Plus we had another use for the vanity once I found a replacement- Mark’s new secondary computer workstation.

Anyways, online, all of the vanitys that I liked were running around $200ish dollars, plus shipping. And shipping something that large doesn’t come cheap! So I was looking at an investment of upwards of $300… YIKES!

To normal people, that may sound inexpensive, but I am a bargain hunter- especially when it comes to these type of things! I spend money where it counts, but if I can get around it with a little DIY, I’ll usually choose that route.

I ended up going to one of the neighborhood garage sale extravaganza’s with my mom and other family, and it was a BLAST! Of course, I couldn’t tell Mark where I was going, it was a top secret mission! He is very minimalistic, and not into the whole garage sale idea, so I sneakily didn’t mention it, and he was asleep when I left anyways I have to admit, I have this habit of bringing things home that I really don’t need, and then they sit there for a while, until maybe one day I get inspired and decide what to do with it… so garage sales for me, are like a shopping addict being thrown into a mega-super-clearance-sale… dangerous!

Lucky for me, I had only a limited amount of time to spend, and I set up a budget! If I didn’t KNOW that I really, truly, NEEDED it, it wasn’t coming home with me! And so we started…

A few houses in, and there wasn’t anything I couldn’t live without… and then we hit this house. There was a lot of stuff, but nothing I HAD to have… until I saw this vanity!!! It was white, probably more of a desk than a vanity since it’s a little deeper than I would expect a vanity to be. It had crayon marks on it, and needed a good scrubbing, but it was solid wood, already white, and PERFECT. It was missing the knob to the drawer, but that was just more reason to find a really cute one to add!

It was only $10!!! I debated on whether bringing such a large item home would make Mark panic a little, or panic a lot. I also debated in my head if I was willing to defend my beautiful diamond in the rough… that looked a little rough… and once I did, I bought it! How could I not for only $10!?! Sure, it needed a fresh coat of paint (which I have on hand, a whole GALLON of white paint!) and a new knob, and who knows if it will fit in my car, but dangit, that is a DEAL!

I found a couple other good deals too that morning, but nothing big, just little photo props and baskets.

Of course, I got a little flack for bringing it home… I would have maybe thought to put it in the garage and hoped he wouldn’t notice for a couple of days until I had the time to fix it up, but I threw that thought out the window when I realized how difficult it was to get in and out of my car. I needed his help.

Over the next week, I cleaned and painted it until it looked almost new again. I found an adorable knob at Anthropologie (thanks to my dear friend Jessica for the suggestion!)- my first ever purchase there by the way! I think I am addicted!!! I also found some really cute spice jars there that I bought (only $4/each, thank you very much!) to put earrings and other jewelry in. They went with the color scheme I was going for also, so that was a bonus.

Over the next weekend, I found a few awesome finds at the Goodwill, including a milkglass chalice ($5), an adorable yellow vase ($3) and plate ($1), and the mirror ($20) which just needed a good coat of white paint.

I decided it would be fun to add a little more color pop to the whole thing, so while perusing the fabric store with my cousin that weekend, I found the most ADORABLE yellow and white chevron striped fabric!! It had been years (about 9 to be exact!) since I have used a sewing machine, but I had been meaning to get to some fun DIY projects, so my dear friend Deena had let me borrow hers! I just bought a yard of the fabric ($9.60 on sale!) as well as a zipper ($1) and some thread ($3) for the project.

The following morning I woke up to the sun, very inspired, and started working on my pillow! I had no idea where to start, but I just eyeballed my little stool that I had bought from Ikea a few months prior, and started cutting. I watched a few Youtube tutorials on how to thread the bobbin, and how to change the different stitches, and away I went! It isn’t perfect by any means, but by-golly, I did it!!

The final touch was the pretty peonies you see in the photo. Those were on sale at Safeway for only $4! They smell amazing, and they are my favorite flower!!! I think they add a nice pop of color to the whole thing too, of course, I’ll have to keep buying more.. but that sounds quite wonderful!

Here is the final product! Sorry, these pics were just taken/edited with my iPhone. I meant to get the pro camera out, but I was rushed at the time with light, and it just didn’t work out this time. I still plan to add a few more things, but for now here it is!

And now…. onto the next project…

We were finally about to meet. Face to face, that is.

One late night, just after graduating high school, I was browsing a website called facethejury.com for some “hotties”. (HA HA HA!!) It was a site where you could post 4 photos of yourself, and then the other site members could rate you on a scale of 1 to 10. This was the “new and improved” version of the well-known HotOrNot.com. You could even write a few sentences about yourself underneath your photo- which was a vast improvement.

So, scrolling through boys and rating them, I came across this photo… (I wish I still had it, I’m sure he does somewhere) He was cute, bleach blonde short messy hair, a puka shell necklace, and big headphones. Yep, total cutie. He had his AIM alias written in his profile, so naturally, I messaged him to say hello.

The cursor blinked…. and blinked…. and nothing. Bummer, but oh well, I thought.

Then, the next day, he messaged me back. He apologized for missing my message, but he was out at a concert. We ended up chatting online for about an hour or two until he finally wrote “may I have the pleasure of hearing your voice on the phone?”.

Normally, to any other guy I had just started talking to online, I would have said “ummm probably not.” But for some reason, I agreed and gave him my number. What am I thinking!?!? I thought… so nervous to be on the phone with him. He promptly called, and we talked for about 3 or 4 hours that night. It’s as if only minutes had passed, and before I knew it it was 2am. We said goodbye, and I went upstairs and wrote in my journal about him. He was perfect, but lived in Michigan, which was just so far away…. if only…

The next few months passed, we chatted online a little bit, and I moved away to Honolulu to attend UH. My first term was a whirlwind of excitement, adventure, new friends and amazing experiences. We’d say “hello” every so often online, but he was technically “unavailable“, and so I wasn’t so interested. On my visit home for winter break, I was upstairs in my room listening to music when I heard the “deedle-ing” of AIM.

It was him. And he was recently finally available. I was still skeptical, but I figured a little flirting couldn’t hurt. After all, he was all the way on the other side of the world, and very complimentary. Chatting online turned into video chatting, long distance telephone calls (remember when that cost extra!?), lots of phone cards, late nights, and early mornings.

We got to know each other so well, it was almost scary. We talked every day, and eventually, I decided that we just had to meet. We weren’t exclusive, but we both weren’t interested in anyone else. I brought up the idea of visiting for the 4th of July, and he was delighted! Freshman year ended at UH, and I moved home. From there, I bought my ticket, and made plans to stay with him for 2 weeks. Of course, my parents and family were all in a hissy.

“You’re going WHERE??? To meet a boy from the INTERNET?!!!??”

Keep in mind, this was 2004, and meeting people online was still a very new and unheard of or dangerous thing to do. Doesn’t everyone who meets online get murdered or raped!?!” “How do you know he’s really who he says he is!?” , etc. etc. Unfortunately for my mom, being a good parent came back to bite her in the butt every time I reminded her that “you said when I turned 18 I could do whatever I want.”

Of course I reassured them that yes, I know who he is, and no, he wasn’t a 58 year old psycho creep. I doubt that made them worry less.

I was young, and ready to have an adventure, and by golly I was going!!! What’s that quote? You’ll never learn to fly if you don’t jump?

There are some moments in life that are so special, that you can remember them as vividly as a photograph. July 1st, 2004 was one of t

hose moments.

I rolled my carry-on down the hallway of the DTW airport terminal, following the signs to the luggage pick-up area. My heart was racing, and the butterflies were flying around like crazy. I turned the corner, and spotted him in an instant. How could I miss him?

Standing there, 6’4″ tall, holding a dozen red roses (and one white one) in jeans and an orange shirt, he smiled at me. I walked over to him and he gave me a huge hug. I fit perfectly in his arms.

He held my hand, and I told him, “your hands are sweaty” (I know, I’m so romantic!), he laughed and said mine were too. Then his friend, who came with him, and was standing beside him said “dude, say something to her, she’s right here!”. I laughed and just looked at the ground as he replied “I know man, my heart is kind of on the floor!”.

We stood there for a while and waited for my luggage, little did I know, I was falling in love. Fast.

That two weeks was some of the best times I have ever had. Summertime, young, falling in love, and just being carefree. He adored me, and I was smitten. Guys never looked at me the way he did, nor did they ever say such sweet things. To him, I was perfect. And so, it was official, we were boyfriend and girlfriend.
Shortly after my trip to Michigan, he moved out to Portland, OR  to be with me. I couldn’t have been happier.

It’s been seven years since the day I first saw him at the DTW airport. It’s been quite the adventure, and we have been through a lot together. He still loves me unconditionally, even if my clothes are everywhere and I forget to rinse my ice cream bowl out in the sink. He knows me better than anyone, and better than I know myself at times. He can read my mind, even when I’m too stubborn to admit it. He has taught me so much, about myself, and about how to be a better person. We have more inside jokes than we can remember, and we love to laugh togethe

r. He has taught me patience, thoughtfulness, and love. He is strong, compassionate, fair, and very intelligent.  He is always honest, more patient than one should be expected to be, and very thoughtful.

I feel so lucky to be loved by someone so sincerely, and so wholly. It has been an amazing seven years growing up together, I cannot wait to see what the future holds for us. You are my other half, and I am so thankful for that one second, of that one day, when I saw your photo and decided to message you.

You just never know what the universe has in store for you.

I love you all the stars in the sky, and the moon, and all the pink balloons, times a piece of Saburo’s sush. <3 Happy seven.

I think unpacking is one of my least favorite things to do. Ever.
It seems never-ending, especially when you have stairs. Up, down, up, down, now where did Quincey go???

But today, I am feeling good. More things are cleaned and unpacked, and less things are in boxes in the garage. We still have a ways to go, but I can tell that progress has been made, and I can do my daily functions without looking through eight different boxes.

This morning, I woke up and made breakfast. It’s the first time I’ve really cooked here, and my first time using a gas stove.

I made cinnamon french toast, and now it smells like home. ♥

Oh, and for those of you wondering about my new office… well, it’s getting there. I have no idea exactly how I want to decorate/organize/set it up yet, I’m currently searching for inspiration. But in case you’re wondering, this is what it looked like today.

It’s a mess… but it’s a beautiful blank canvas, and I couldn’t be more excited about it.

Oh, Quincey loves it too, I promised him a permanent spot by the window so he could sun bathe while I work.

He gave me extra nuzzles.

]]> http://courtneyjade.com/blog/cinnamon-french-toast/feed 0 http://courtneyjade.com/blog/hello-new-year http://courtneyjade.com/blog/hello-new-year#comments Sun, 02 Jan 2011 06:55:44 +0000 courtney jade http://courtneyjade.com/blog/?p=1229 January… you are finally here, and you have come too soon.

I took the entire week after Christmas off of work to move into our new home and get all settled in… and get a lot of other things done…. well, to say the least, we are still cleaning/unpacking, and getting settled in. It will probably take a while, but I’m not going to lie, I spent much of the week catching up on some good old R&R! I know, I know, I am guilty of being a lazy daisy this past week… I had so many things planned that I wanted/needed to get done, and I didn’t even try to start on my list.

I think I just needed a week to relax, unwind, soak in all of the newness of our home, and sleep. I have never had such a crazy year as I did last year, and I am looking forward to a very busy and successful 2011 as well! I have a LOT to get done in the means of new pricing/packages, etc. so I can release all of that for all of my fabulous clients! Thanks in advance for your patience, I’m going to try and get all of that wrapped up this coming week to release to everyone!

Also, if you are waiting on the surprise in the mail from me, hopefully that will be ready to go in another week or so as well.

It’s a LOT getting unpacked and settled in, especially when you have an OCD clean freak of a boyfriend <3 (I mean that with all of the dust-free, chemically cleaned, bleached and spotless love in my heart) He has really been amazing with this whole move. In fact, right now he is on his hands and knees scrubbing the bathroom floors, and showers. He takes over the dirty work, and I am SO thankful for him. Seriously.

Anyways, since I love lists, and can’t seem to get away from them… ever. (I think it’s an addiction.. along with my addictions to horizontal stripes, Tillamook and Haggen Daaz ice creams, and hoodies)

Here are some of the awesome moments and memories that 2010 has left me with:

♥  My one year anniversary as a Marketing Associate, with a new title coming soon

♥ More amazing clients and success than I ever could have imagined for this year.

♥ Amazing clients who have turned into great friends.

♥ Another year with my health

♥ Trying new foods, and LIKING them… including a cucumber roll! (Thanks Vishnu)

♥ Making lots of new photo friends, and sharing all sorts of experiences with them. Seriously thankful for them.

♥ Purchasing our very first home with the boy whom I adore more than anyone in this world.

♥ A completely booked summer/autumn season for my photo business

♥ An AMAZING 25th birthday party at the beach with great friends! Seriously the best birthday in a long time… I’m thinking this will need to be a tradition.

♥ Traveling to Costa Rica, my first out of the country trip. Seriously an AWESOME experience. Really gives me the travel bug… there are so many places to explore in this world, I have an entire other list of places I would love to go (see, there I go with the lists again!) If you are planning a destination wedding in 2011 or 2012, let me know! I have some great all-inclusive packages!

♥ New music. I love new music.

♥ Floating the river for the very first time with some very awesome friends.

♥ Making good friends with people at work. I love my work girls!!!

♥ Seeing the Lion King on Broadway with my mom, front row center!!!

♥ Lots of trips to delicious restaurants.

♥ Attending my first Blazer game! Thanks Brooklyn

Things I am looking forward to for 2011

♥ Making our house into our home sweet home

♥ New business approach, organization and pricing structure.

♥ Advancing in my marketing/design career

♥ Valentine’s Day (I have a surprise planned for my lover! Eeee!!) Also, it’s my favorite holiday!

♥ Celebrating my 7 year anniversary with Mark. Wow. Now that is crazy.

♥ Creating my very own office space. I am so excited about this blank slate… now what to do with it…

♥ More networking, friend making, and business learning

♥ Hopefully a trip or two out of the state, possibly out of the country.

♥ Paying off my credit card.

♥ Eating new things, with new friends and old.

♥ Taking more photos!!!

I’m sure there are more, but my washer just made that pretty ding-a-ling noise that it makes, meaning I need to switch it to the dryer now. And I’m hungry! Lol.

Wishing you all a very happy new year, and excitement for the future! <3

Well, I have been keeping this under wraps for quite some time now, but it has been one of the hardest things I’ve had to do! But I’m finally ready to spill the beans!

Mark and I just purchased our first home together!!!!!!!

I am beyond ecstatic, I can hardly express how excited I am. I didn’t want to say anything about it on the internet in fear that something may have fallen through, and then I would have to explain to everyone when they asked “so how is the house coming along?!” that something fell through and we were no longer getting it… and I would probably tear up and cry every. single. time. So to save myself from that possibility, keeping it under wraps was the best option.

But I am SO excited that I can now share it all with you!!! It was a long and stressful process, but everything ended up working out, and Mark and I could not be more thrilled.

warning- LONG post ahead!

It all started about a year ago…

For those of you who don’t know, I actually work full time in the marketing/design department for a mortgage company, so the thought and realization of the possibility and benefits to buying a home have been on the table for just over a year now. In my head, I was ready and excited to buy a year ago. However, Mark, with his ever-steady-let’s-evaluate-every-little-detail attitude (which might sound like a negative thing here, but rest assured I am SO thankful for his “realism” in situations like these) laid it all out and just wasn’t so comfortable doing so at that time. He was still car-less and taking advantage of public transit at the time, so our options for locations of homes would have been very limited. That, and the worry of taking on such a large financial commitment was a little scary… so our home-buying plans came to a halt early 2010.

This year, however, has been a really great one for Mark and I. He is steadily advancing in his company, and I have established myself at my 9-5 as well. Photography has been insanely busy this year for me, Mark was able to purchase a car in the late spring, and things have come a long way in the past year.

While I would secretly look at RMLS every day, and save my favorites, daydreaming about the time when we’d be able to start home-searching ourselves, I knew that patience and persistence would eventually pay off. I don’t know if it was the television being stuck on HGTV for months, or what, but in early September, Mark asked me- “so, what’s going on with the house search?”

“WHAT?!!?!?” I replied. “We can’t afford a house” (Ok, I was having a bad day… you know, the kind where you really didn’t want to look at your bank account, but you knew you should, so you did, and then you regretted it.. kind of… but you realize that you probably shouldn’t have went out to lunch 5 times last week, or bought that really cute dress that was on sale? yea… it was one of those days.)

I re-couped myself and thought about this again. I said “Well, have you been looking for houses? Because I thought you didn’t think it was a good time yet, and you haven’t sent me any houses to look at, so I just assumed you were still on that same page. Plus I didn’t want to pressure you if you did still feel that way.”

“Well no,” he said “but I think it’s time.”

My heart did a few back-flips… these were the words I had been waiting to hear for a year!!!

“OK! I said, well, check out these houses I have saved!” I pull up our Realtor’s website (www.portlandshortsales.com) and showed him my favorites. He liked a few, so I agreed to call our Realtor in the morning and set up a time to view some houses in the next week or so.

We ended up going the following evening (because our Realtor Alex is awesome!) and checking out a few houses. Here is where the story gets interesting…

I thought we were going to look at one house, but Alex actually took us to see the house next door to the one I thought we were looking at. “Why not?” I said, and we checked it out anyways.

We. loved. it.

One problem… the house already had an accepted offer in on it, and they weren’t accepting any back-up offers! Bummer. We tried to get into the house next door, but the key was no where to be found.. odd.. but Alex had another home to show us in the area, so we checked it out, and then called it a night. It was great to get a feel for the neighborhood, and we knew we definitely wanted to live in that community, so we just kept an eye out for new listings to pop up.

We ended up making an offer on a short sale house that was on the same block as the one we looked at. It was a beauty! But short sales are a MESS and so we weren’t expecting much to come from it. About two or three weeks after we submitted our first offer on the short sale, the home we toured (and loved) came back up on the market… the other buyer’s financing fell through!

I saw it pop up in my daily listing email and immediately emailed Alex. Mark and I talked it over, and we decided that it would be a much safer road to put an offer in on this house. This house was a bank owned (much better than a short sale!) and there was even a downpayment assistance program available for bank owned homes in this area. (They said they could do some short sales too, but come to find out it would have been a nightmare!)

So we made the decision to put in an offer on the house we toured and loved. We know that the bank already accepted a certain price, so we just went in at that price and hoped for the best! It was about 15k less than the offer we put in on the short sale house, so we were happy with that.

We heard back two days later that the bank had accepted our offer, so we withdrew our offer on the short sale, and now almost 2 months later, we have ourselves a home!!! We got the keys on Friday, and today we went out to the house to take a few photos and have the carpets professionally cleaned!! I am getting SO excited!

We plan on painting and packing this week, and moving on the 26th! Eeeee!!! I can’t wait to be in there and settled. It will cut my hour long commute down to about 10 minutes or less, which I am excited about, however Mark will get the opposite commute… so I’m thinking good thoughts for him…

Anywho, here are some photos of the new place!!

We are in love.
And we are in love with our home.

I can’t wait to show you updates as we get settled in!!! We have ordered our washer and dryer, and we just bought our refrigerator today, we can’t wait for them to show up! I can’t wait to paint, decorate, and make the place OURS. I have been waiting for a long time to do this, and yet I still feel like a very young homeowner.

We feel so excited, happy and thankful that we were able to do this.
It will be a very merry christmas for us this year.  <3

I just can’t help it. I love beautiful packaging!!!!

One of my favorite places to shop is at Trader Joe’s. My only complaint about that store is that it isn’t bigger, and it doesn’t carry everything I need, so I often find myself making two stops, or just going there for some specific items. However, I totally get sucked in… I end up buying things that I hadn’t set out for in the first place, and often it’s for the simple fact that they look so dang adorable!!! Last year I bought a pumpkin pancake mix because I loved the box it came in so much. I still haven’t made them….

Some of you know, I am a graphic designer by trade. It’s what I went to school for, and I currently hold down a full time job working in marketing doing graphic design on top of my photography business. I know that presenting your product in a professional, beautiful, and creative way can raise your sales, as well as your brand’s awareness. I know that it’s a proven fact that when people are given the option between two identical products, they will always be more prone to choose the one they think appears better, regardless of price.

So when I was at Trader Joe’s the other night, thinking about all of this, I snapped a few pics because I just couldn’t resist!! I wanted to buy them all because I’m a total sucker because I love good design, and good products, but due to current circumstances, I am trying not to load up on too many things I won’t need/use in the near future. Anyways, here are some of the beautiful things I am talking about.

And all of them are SO reasonably priced, nothing here is over $5! Which makes the addiction even worse! LOL!!

Anyways, the point is: branding is key! I think this is something that gets put to the sidelines all too often. I like to present my clients with packaged prints that look like gifts. I want them to be excited from the moment they see the package, until after they see all of the beautiful things they’ve ordered.

To do this, I have put a lot of time and effort into growing my brand, and fine tuning my packaging. I think it is an ever-evolving process, as I’m always finding new and different ideas that I want to incorporate! Regardless, my clients are left with a good feeling

Happy Saturday!! I’m off to eat some pancakes and do a little Christmas shopping! Wooo!!!